短篇的美文

时间：2024-06-09 14:15:11 经典美文我要投稿

短篇的美文[精]

　　在日复一日的学习、工作或生活中，大家都知道美文吧？在各种竞争日益激烈的今天，在网络中，很多人都会喜欢一些比较伤感的美文，人们通过阅览这种文章来对自己的心情进行调解，以此为一种精神上的寄托。你知道怎么才能写好美文吗？下面是小编整理的短篇的美文，仅供参考，欢迎大家阅读。

短篇的美文[精]

短篇的美文1

　　Then is over; this is now. The less time and effort you put into looking at the past, the more you will have for living and experiencing this day. You will also find that letting go of the past will give you a deeper sense of strength. Instead of allowing past mistakes and worries to drain your energies, you will have a renewed energy to live your life to the fullest and enjoy it more.

　　Being content with yourself and optimistic about your future is not difficult. Whatever is in the past is over; learn from it and move on. When you are self-motivated enough to do this, you will see that moving ahead is the best definition of living life.

　　With that said, what can you do now? Sure it is easy for me to tell you to forget the past, yet it is a whole different practice to actually do it. Life is a complex set of events much of which of course is real, yet a large amount is just your view of what really happened.

短篇的美文2

　　梦想成真”是一句美好的祝福。每个人都有自己的梦想，有些人不乏好很好的想法、目标和计划。让梦想成真，是许多人实现自身价值的重要途径。但是有的.人有了梦想之后，要么长期犹豫之中，迟迟拿不出实现梦想的具体行动；要么碰到一点困难打退堂鼓，甚至彻底放弃了自己的梦想。常言道：心动不如行动。再美好的梦想与目标，再完美的计划和方案，如果不能尽快在行动中落实，最终只能是纸上谈兵，空想一番。

　　有了梦想，就应该迅速有力地实施。坐在原地等待机遇，无异于盼天上掉馅饼。毫不犹豫尽快拿出行动，为梦想的实现创造条件，才是梦想成真的必经之路。有的人确立了好的目标以后，一会儿担心过程太长，怕坚持不下去；一会儿担心任务太难，怕到最后失败。如此前怕狼后怕虎，在彷徨中裹足不前，导致机遇在身边溜走，白白浪费了光阴。

短篇的美文3

　　青春Youth

　　Youth is not a time of life; it is a state of mind. It is not a matter of rosy cheeks, red lips and supple knees. It is a matter of the will, a quality of the imagination, vigor of the emotions; it is the freshness of the deep spring of life.

　　青春并非生命的一段旅程，而是一种心境;非粉颊、红唇和柔膝，而是远大的理想、磅礴的想象、旺盛的激情;是清新的'生命源泉不断涌动。

　　Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity, duanwenw.com of the appetite for adventure over the love of ease. This often exits in a man of 60, more than a boy of 20. Nobody grows merely by the number of years; we grow old by deserting our ideas.

　　青春意味着勇气战胜怯懦，意味着勇于进取，不屑平凡。如此锐气，二十年后有之，六旬男子则多见。年岁有加，并非垂老，理想的放弃才真正意味着垂垂老矣。

　　Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul. Worry, fear, self-distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust.

　　年华流失只将皱纹留痕于皮肤，然而激情的冷却将皱纹留痕于灵魂。担忧、害怕、自我放逐使心灵扭曲，使春之朝气灰飞烟灭。

　　Whether 60 or 16, there is in every human being’s heart the lure of wonders, the unfailing childlike appetite of what’s next and the joy of the game of living. In the center of your heart and my heart there is a wireless station; so long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer, duanwenw.com courage and power from men and from infinite, so long as you are young.

　　不论六十或是十六，人人心中皆有好奇之心，有如孩童般探索未知事物的欲望经久不衰，并充满生活之乐趣。在你我内心最深处，存在一台无线电台，只要能自人类、还有那无限宇宙不断收取美丽、希望、快乐、勇气的信号，你便青春常驻。

短篇的美文4

　　Learning English Now English is becoming more and more useful.It can help you to get a better job.English can allow you to communicate freely with foreigners.You will make new friends with people all over the world.In the 21st century,English will be a powerful weapon in our life.You will also find a nice surprise—— speaking English is so fun!

　　Let’s master English to make our future brighter!

　　英语变得越来越有用.它能帮你找到一份更好的工作.英语让你与外国人自由交流,可以与世界各国的人交朋友.在二十一世纪英语会成为我们生活的强大武器,他还能给你带来惊喜.说英语真的`很有趣.让我们的未来更好.

　　I like music very much.I always listen to music on my way to school.Music is like my best friend.When I feel down and blue,I will listen to my favorite music.This is a world of my own and no one can disturb me.Music is so wonderful that it makes my life colorful.

　　我非常喜欢音乐.我总是在去学校的路上听音乐.音乐像我最好的朋友.当我心情郁闷的时候,我会听最喜欢的音乐.这是一个属于我的世界,没有人可以打扰我.音乐如此美妙,它使我的生活变得丰富多彩.

　　If I Were a Millionaire ，What would you do if you were a millionaire?Many people would buy a house or travel the world.As for me,I would start a school.If I had a school,I would be able to educate many children and teach them right from wrong.Anyone will tell you that children are a country’s future.If my dream comes true,I will be very happy because I will be doing my country a good service.

　　如果你是个百万富翁,你将会做些什么呢?许多人会买房子或环游世界.至于我,我会开办一所学校.如果我有一个学校,我就能够教育很多孩子,教育他们明辨是非.大家都说孩子是祖国的未来.如果我梦想成真,我就会高兴因为我为祖国作出巨大贡献.

　　I think smiling is as important as sunshine. Smiling is like sunshine because it can make people happy and have a good day. If you aren’t happy, you can smile, and then you will feel happy. Someone may say, “But I don’t feel happy.” Then I would say, “Please smile as you do when you are happy or play with your friends happily. You will really be happy again.”

　　Smiling can let you have more friends.So I say, smiling is like a flower. It will give you happiness.

　　我认为微笑是一样重要的象阳光。微笑是象阳光，因为它可能使人愉快和有一个早晨好。如果您不是愉快的，您能微笑，您然后将感觉愉快。某人也许说， “但是我不感到愉快”。然后我会说， “请微笑，您，当您愉快地是愉快或戏剧与您的朋友。您真正地再将是愉快的”。

　　微笑可能让您有更多朋友。如此我说，微笑是象花。它将给您幸福。

　　It was Sunday and I have to go to school. I finished my homework the day before. So I decided to help mother do housework. I washed some clothes after I got up. Then I went shopping with a basket. I bought some meat, eggs and some vegetables in the market. After I came back, I started to cook dinner for the whole family. In the evening, I sat at the table and began to write down on my notebook what I had done during the day.

　　它是星期天，并且我没有必须去学校。我前一天完成了我的家庭作业。如此我决定帮助做家事。在我起来了之后，我洗了一些衣裳。然后我带着篮子去购物。我在市场上买了一些肉、蛋和有些菜。在我回来了之后，我开始为全家烹调晚餐。在晚上，我在我的笔记本写下什么我白天做了什么。

短篇的美文5

　　这两天头痛欲裂，像有根电钻每天下午敲击我的脑袋，疼到夜深人静，连自己都不知道是怎么睡着的。睡醒之后，头痛的状况会缓解许多，表面看来，似乎是睡眠不够的问题，但实质上，我知道自己是心理出了问题。

　　心理的负荷太重了，杂念又多，很容易让自己处于一种精神疲惫状，大脑永远不停的运转，却无法聚焦核心，生活上的，工作上的，家庭的，孩子的，他人的，交往的，种种细枝末节都在时不时地影响着我的内心世界。我知道我该放下一些心理上的包袱，调整状态归零重新开始了。有些事情急也没有用，比如身体的、专业的，只能保持一种好的心态，坚守一种信念，多行动，多思考。放弃一些不切实际的想法，无所谓一些在自己的生命中无足轻重的人与事，学会不在乎。

　　不在乎不是一种麻木，一种冷漠。不在乎有的时候会让自己变得豁达，变得坚强，让自己能够经常追随自己的内心，真正关心自己，呵护自己的心灵，避免因外界受到伤害。每个人都有自己的活法，找到一种适合自己的方式，就会生活的平静、坦然、幸福。而我们每个人似乎一辈子都在追寻，我们所期待的似乎永远都在我们的.前方，触摸不到，追赶不及。所以，活着本身就是一辈子的追寻。

　　我，已不在年轻。虽然很不愿承认，虽然很留恋青春美好的年华，然，那一切在我还没有真正意义上的懂得与珍惜的状态下悄然远离。所以每每看到类似《致青春》这样的影片，总怀念与慨叹美好的时光，有时甚至滚滚热泪随影片一起追忆自己已逝的青春。过去不能回去，未来终究会来。对于未来，现在的我又是年轻的，所以有了以往的经验，更容易着急现在的时光，害怕未来的自己又会追悔现在的一切。但是，人似乎在自己人生的每一个阶段，都是懵懂的，迷茫的，看不清楚未来的。以为自己很清晰，走着走着，却发现前路漫漫无尽期，但过段时间，又会逐渐明朗起来。“山重水复疑无路，柳暗花明又一村”。正是在这样一次次的重复过程中，我们失望又希望，希望又失望，然后又重新希望。人生就是这样的轮回。看开了，一切都无所谓，执着了，一切皆有意义。所以，没有谁的人生是绝对美丽，也没有谁的人生是绝对悲惨。每个人的生活方式其实本质上都一样，吃饭、睡觉、工作、生活。但不同的人经历过程的心态不同，导致体味的人生各有千秋，每个人按照自己对生活的理解、对人生价值的定义，追寻着自己想要的生活，辛苦耕耘，满心期待，苦苦坚守。

　　累的时候，学会放下，学会无所谓，学会好好爱自己，陪伴你一生的唯自己而已!没有谁有义务必须对你好，所以，别人对你好，学会感恩，别人对你不好，也不该有所抱怨。主动付出你的爱，赠人玫瑰，手留余香，你也会体味到付出快乐的滋味。人生不易，我们都要好好爱自己!

短篇的美文6

　　When love beckons to you, follow him, though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you, yield to him, though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you. And when he speaks to you, believe in him, though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.

　　For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning. Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun, so shall he descend to our roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

　　But if, in your fear, you would seek only love’s peace and love’s pleasure, then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love’s threshing-floor, into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears. Love gives naught but it self and takes naught but from itself. Love possesses not, nor would it be possessed, for love is sufficient unto love.

　　Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself. But if you love and must have desires, let these be your desires:

　　To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.

　　To know the pain of too much tenderness.

　　To be wounded by your own understanding of love;

　　And to bleed willingly and joyfully.

　　To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;

　　To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy;

　　To return home at eventide with gratitude;

　　And then to sleep with a payer for the belovaed in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.

　　中文译文：当爱召唤你时

　　当爱召唤你时，请追随它，尽管这条道路艰难险峻。当爱的羽翼环绕你时，由着它吧，尽管隐藏在其羽翼之下的剑可能会伤害到你。当爱向你诉说时，请相信它，尽管它的声音可能会粉碎你的梦想，就如同北风蹂躏花园的花草一般。

　　正如爱会给你带来美妙时光一样，它也会使你受煎熬。爱会助你成长，也会帮你去除缺点。爱会爬上枝头，抚爱你在阳光下颤动的嫩枝，它a也会溜到根部，撼动力你依附到泥土上的根基。

　　但是，如果你在恐惧之中只想寻求爱的平和与欢乐，那你最好隐藏你的真心，远离爱的考验，进入没有四季更替的世界，在那里你会大笑，但你并非总是笑着，你会哭泣，但你也并非总在流泪。爱只将自己付出，也只收获到自己。爱什么都不拥有，也不会被谁占有，因为对爱来说，它本身就已足够。

　　爱除了实现自我之外，别无他求。但如果你爱着某人或某物，你肯定会有所求，让以下成为你的欲求吧：

　　将自己融化并像流动的小溪一样向夜色吟唱其优美的旋律。

　　知晓过多的柔情所带来的.苦痛。

　　被自己对爱的理解所伤害;

　　并自愿和愉快地去受伤。

　　在黎明，带着欢愉的心情醒来，感谢充满爱的又一天;

　　在黄昏怀着感恩之心回家;

　　然后，为内心所爱之人祈祷，嘴边唱着赞美之歌，就这样入眠。

短篇的美文7

　　I look out of the window stupidly, the heart that has long been grind through the score, should have been numb long ago. But, still very painful, very heavy. Achievements, day and night, I fight for it, work hard, in the end is still better than others. My heart is cold and cold, like the weather in front of the eyes, chaotic and noisy.

短篇的美文8

　　“你们还年轻”，每当遇到挫折时，大人们都喜欢用这样的话来安慰，然而在这条年轻的旅途中，又有几人是一帆风顺，这一路上我不断的跌倒爬起，命运像是在有意整我，一次次将我领到悬崖的边缘，然而我却还是不顾一切的纵身往下跳，落地的前一秒还天真的以为天上掉下了馅饼，上天对我的垂怜，等到重重的'摔下来时才清醒过来，后悔当初的愚昧。于是开始拼命的往上爬，可是还是一次一次的无功而返，我不知道还在这里绕多久，但我却从来没有过放弃的念头，因为这一秒不放弃，下一秒才会有希望，要想重新站起来，就一定得坚持。

短篇的美文9

　　Progress in science and the improvement of living conditions have led m the rapid growth of the world population. Modern medical science, for example, has made it possible

　　科学的进步和生活条件的改善导致了世界人口的迅速增长。譬如，现代医学可以使幼儿健康成长，使人们长寿。由于生活条件的改善，特别是农村生活条件的改善，家庭人门日渐增多。结果，世界人口增长如此迅猛以致于现在人口超过了50亿。

　　for babies to grow up healthily and for people to live longer.With improved living conditions, particularly in the countryside, people tend to have larger families. As a result, the world population has increased so rapidly that it has now exceeded 5 billion.

　　But the overgrowth of population presents a threat to the existence of human society. A large population demands a great deal of food supply and shelter space. However,the limited productivity and scarce natural resources can hardly meet the needs of the ever-Increasing population. Thus in the long run, the overgrowth of the world population will only harm mankind.

　　但是，人口过分增长对人类社会的存在构成了威胁。大量的人口需要大批的'粮食供给和大量的住宅。然而，有限的生产能力和不足的自然资源几乎不能满足日益增长的人口的需要。因此，从长远的观点看，过多的世界人口将会危害人类。控制人口

　　To guarantee the steady development of human society, mankind must realize the consequences resulting from a fast population growth and the importance of carrying out a family planning programme. Only by adopting effectual measures can human society develop steadily and have a bright future.

　　为了保证人类社会的稳定发展，人类必须意识到人口迅速增长所造成的后果和执行计划生育方针的重要性。只有采取有效措施，人类社会才能稳步发展，才会有光明的未来。

短篇的美文10

　　读书时，有时会有一段文字萦绕脑际，永不离去。好像是在十八岁时读杜鲁门·卡波特的短篇小说《关上最后一扇门》，那最后一节就紧黏在脑袋里。是这样的文章:“于是他把头紧贴在枕头上，双手捂住耳朵。他这样想，去想无关紧要的事，去想想风吧。”

　　我非常喜欢最后的这个句子。

　　我曾在希腊一座小岛上生活过，那是座此前连名字都没听过的小岛。当然，除了我们两人(我和妻子)没有日本人。靠着只言片语的希腊话，好歹对付日常所用，此外就只管伏案工作，工作间隙常去散步。那时候，我们仿佛就生活在风中。大多是微风，不时会变大。大多是干燥的风，不时会含有湿气，极其罕见地还会带来雨，但总之风无时不在。我们与风同时醒来，与风同行同止，与风同时沉入睡眠。不管我们到哪儿去，风都如影随形。在海港的咖啡馆前，风匆匆忙忙将遮阳伞的边缘吹得哗哗作响;在无人的`游艇码头，船桅不停发出咔嗒咔嗒的干燥响声;步入林中，风拂过绿叶四处飘飞。它将漂浮在海上的白云运往遥远的岸边，它让桌前窗边的九重葛花翩翩起舞。它浓淡不匀地运走街头小贩的吆喝，送来不知何处的烤肉的香味。我们几乎片刻不能忘记风的存在。

　　迄今为止，我去过世界上许多地方，可是再也不曾像生活在那座希腊小岛时那样，深切感受到风的存在。我们简直像三个人相依为命一般，默默生活在那座岛上--我们两人，再加上风。这是怎么回事?也许那儿本是那样的地方，也许那儿是个风拥有灵魂的所在。因为那真是一个除了风几乎一无所有的宁静小岛，再不就是碰巧住在那里的时候，我正好进入了深刻思考风的时期。

　　思考风，这并非人人可为，也并非随时随地可为。人真正能思考风，仅限于人生中一小段时期。我这么觉得。

短篇的美文11

　　经历一场生死离别，才觉得我还应该在成熟许多。老人，活着的时候积善行德，儿女亲人晚辈都来送行，场面总是让人不自觉地跟着伤心，病痛折磨中的老人安详地离开更是一种解脱，然而，听到亲人阵阵哭声看到他们伤心难过的样子，我也实在劝说不了自己，多么希望这是假的，这是梦，然后我能哭醒，这一切就结束了。只是还在继续，善良的老人总是愿意为别人着想，怕儿女心疼，多么难过的时候也不吭声，可是真的也能料到，失去亲人他们多么难过。每听到有人哭着“再也见不到了。。”就更加刺痛，每个人都有自己的故事，有自己无心的却无法挽回的过去，更有无奈却又不得不继续咬牙前进的`苦楚，也有来不及去做和来得及却不想不能不敢去做的矛盾。曾记得有人说过，尽孝最不能等，试问什么又能等呢？感慨最近两周状况一直不好，以为是经历了多么痛苦的事情，纵然很有委屈，也只是太过担心受伤罢了，难得糊涂啊，这个事情没有必要再去纠结了。不敢面对也许有一天会发现这是个误会而遗憾。随着年龄增长，貌似逐渐成熟，得到的同时也害怕失去了。乐观积极向上的人生才是终身追求的目标。一个人成熟的标志就是能明白发生在自己身上百分之九十的事情和别人无关。

　　亲眼目睹了丧礼的整个过程，人生就是如此，多少的遗憾与牵挂也会烟消云散，生活中必然要经历很多的无奈，不必去苛求，才能更潇洒。想去见的人就见，想去做的事就做，有就去珍惜。不能在去计较：叶的飘落是树的无情还是风的多情。还有很多更美好的东西值得去寻找。我想我大概是能明白了，俗话说了福不双至，祸不单行，难过一阵就过去吧，不要让那个恶劣的情绪再去影响其他了，且行且珍惜，有更多值得珍惜的在等待。

　　结语：随着网络文化的发展，美文的概念已经不限定于某种文体，或某类内容了。而是文章内容丰富表达清晰的文章都被称之为美文。以上就是小编整理收集的情感的短篇美文，希望对大家有所帮助！

短篇的美文12

　　希望是人生动力之源。父母总是希望自己的孩子能够做得很好。希望使我们有梦想。希望使我们变得有耐心。

　　Life teaches us not to despair even in the darkest hour, because after every night there is a day. Nothing remains the same we have only one choice keep moving on in life and be hopeful.

　　人生教会我们即使是在最困难的时候都不要绝望，因为黑暗之后终将是黎明。没有什么事一成不变的，我们惟有充满希望地继续生活。

　　Life teaches us not to regret over yesterday, for it has passed and is beyond our control.

　　人生教会我们不要对过去的事感到后悔，因为过去的终究是过去了并且我们已无法控制。

　　Tomorrow is unknown, for it could either be bright or dull. So the only alternative is work hard today, so that we will enjoy a better tomorrow.

　　没人知道明天会是怎样，因为它可以是光明的同样也可以是无趣的.。所以，唯一的选择便是在今天努力工作，这样才能让我们去享受更美好的明天。

短篇的美文13

　　无时无刻的不在忍受着分离，却不知这分离是天各一方，亦或是遥遥无期。纷飞的落叶，像你不经意间留下的眼泪，飘在地上摔的粉碎，每一片落叶是我的一次心碎，每一滴眼泪是我的一个轮回。

　　——题记

　　“喜欢你。”三个字从你的唇间飘了出来，像这世间最美的天籁音符飞向我的耳际，却狠狠的撞击着我的'心……你抬起头，那笑颜满面，不染一丝清愁的眼看着我仓促，不知所措的脸，然后轻轻浅笑，仿佛知道我不会拒绝一般……是的，我没法拒绝，此刻我的脑海所有的否定键都失灵了……别人说先表白的人就输了，一辈子受被表白的人控制，可我却心甘情愿一辈子被你牵着鼻子走，走到白发上头，走到时间尽头，一直走，一直走，一直走……

　　学校清晨公园的树林里，你大笑，大叫，像个野丫头一般疯跑。我坐在树上安静的看着你，静静的，静静的……然后静不下来的我也跟着你疯闹。人群纷扰的大街上，我们拎着大包小包那些足以把我们覆盖不见的东西屁颠屁颠的走着，一边走还一边跳，路人奇怪的眼光直接被我内心的幸福感冲刷不见。黄昏夕阳轻抚白云的天空下，你问我爱不爱你，我祥装在思考的样子，然后你揪着我的耳朵叫我对着夕阳大声说爱你。其实我何止想对着夕阳说，我还想对全世界的每个认识的不认识的人说。

　　每次牵你手的时候总会一次又一次的在心中下决定，要爱你，一直那么的爱你，那么爱你。每呼吸一次，就多爱你一分。每眨眼一次，就多想你一次。直到闭上眼睛，没有呼吸。每一次抱你在怀的时候都会一次又一次的在脑海里想着，要守护你，保护你，关心你，永远，永远……

　　情感敌不过世俗的狂轰肆虐，你挣扎，你反抗，你留下了那一抹无邪的眼泪，却终败给了这个冷漠的世界，你唯一能做的就是叫我等待。于是，我等了，等黄了秋风落叶，等走了天青地白，等到了这萧萧世界落满尘灰。亦等不来你容颜入怀的那刻。

　　今夜我又为你埋下思念的诗章，字里行间洒满我浓浓的忧伤。今夜我又为你感叹残忍的时光，沧桑岁月笔墨我苦苦的煎熬。然思念的身影幻灭幻现，感叹的时光忽短忽长……

　　最终我走出感情的喧嚣，在心里轻轻的说一句：我爱你，那个她和她一半的留在记忆中的她！

短篇的美文14

　　Rob is a commercial saturation1 diver for Global Divers2 in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore3 drilling rigs.

　　Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 FM in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won:

　　Hi Sue,

　　Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.

　　Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma4 with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all .

　　Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.

　　As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.

　　This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel5 powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment that sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful6 temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.

　　Now, this all sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.

　　What I do when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's fantastic...it's like working in a Jacuzzi.

　　Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt7 started to itch8. So, of course, I scratched it. This, of course, only made things worse. Within a few seconds my bottom started to feel a burning sensation. I pulled the hose out from my back, thinking that maybe the water was too hot, but the damage was done.

　　In agony, I realized what had happened.

　　The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it directly into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, so the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.

　　When I had scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish, and all of its poisonous, stinging tentacles9, into the crack of my bottom.

　　I immediately informed the dive supervisor10 of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically11.

　　Needless to say, I aborted12 the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing13 in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber14 dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass15 helmet.

　　As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.

　　The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my bottom was swollen16shut.

　　So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your bottom.

　　Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."

　　Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?

　　May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day.